Monday, September 15, 2008
A Birthday and an Epiphany
Today is my Judah's 2nd birthday! I was getting him dressed this morning and had him on top of the kitchen counter because it's just easier with him that way. In the hustle and bustle of the morning- the other boys running, talking loudly, the TV blaring, me thinking about making CJ's lunch, etc., I looked up and caught a glance of my future: One day soon, my 2 year old will indeed be towering above me as he grows into a man. Wow! Looking into his sweet face (while he is pulling at my hair), my eyes swelled with the tears realizing he is my last little boy I will fasten overalls on and my last little one to teach to aim correctly while using the potty.
I became overwhelmed with a sense of urgency. It wasn't to spoil him or buy him all he wanted in this precious stage of life. It was to make sure I am being the very best mom God has called and equipped me to be. I felt the urgency to equip him to be the man, friend, husband, and father God has planned for him. For us, that looks so differently than how the world portrays it. It actually is anti-world in so many respects. All Jesus loving parents face the same dilemma: How do I teach my kids to be in the world and not of it. Paul wrote about being transformed by renewing our minds in Romans 12 and how conforming should not even be a goal of ours; yet, as parents, we want our kids to "fit in" and to "look the part." We want them to be popular, liked, and invited to all of the parties. But, I don't.
I don't want the "nice" kids. I don't want kids who walk on eggshells around others because they might hurt someone's feelings and not get an invitation. I want my kids to be warriors for truth and to stand up for what God says is right- even if it means not fitting in all of the time. Am I teaching my kids those values? Will my boys love their wives as Jesus loves the church? Will they be men after God's own heart? Or will they be bratty grown ups who pout when life doesn't go their way or they get denied something their flesh wants? That is why parenting is so tough. You won't know until they are grown up and have children of their own to reflect what you passed onto them. And even then you aren't sure.
Happy birthday, Sweet Judah! Mommy clings to you a little tighter because you are my last little boy and, selfishly, my last chance to get it right. I can't wait to see what awesome things our mighty God does with you! He gave me your name before we even knew you were a boy. I pray you will praise Him all the days of your life!!
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